Skip to main content

The Journal


The Journal 

I had  always succeeded 
to cut and keep aside 
the coiling tendrils
of the creepers of sorrow 
that come my way...

The cast away, unattended 
mass in the attic of my mind
starts to fume and smoulder
and the darkness engulfs me ..

The surrounding darkness 
gets thicker as days crawl by
There is not even a silver streak
anywhere in the horizon..

I curl up in the darkest corner
of the deepest abyss in my mind..
Drained of the slightest strength 
to move or even to open the eyes..

It was never like this in the past..
A breeze, a drizzle,
a fresh bloom, song of a quail, 
the first rays of the Sun

Even a friendly phone call
used to brighten me up 
pulling me into the light 
up from the darkness ..

As profound sorrow engulfs me
I hear a feeble murmur from within..
I strain with all the bones in my ears..
and guess I hear what it says .

"Do not look for light outside..
It is hidden in the ashes,
somewhere deep within..
You only need to blow soft 
to rekindle the embers of the spirit.."

I stirr up and try to blow
A hiss, a feeble breath and 
a stronger phoooh..
"No no..It should be words "
I hear my inner voice whisper..

I gather up all my courage
to form words for my emotions...
Words tumble out reluctantly 
clumsily , intermittently...
and gradually rush out like a stream ..

I watch the darkness dissolve
in the stream of words..
The horizon turns crimson
heralding the rising Sun..

Preetha Raj



Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Ageing

Ageing   Age is just a number, they say... But no no no , it is not just that... Age is the changes upon you around you and inside you.. Age is more silver locks, wringles on the forehead,  crow's feet at the edges  of the mouth and the eyes.. Age is the sagging skin,  loose muscles and aching limbs .. Age is missing connections in networks, neural as well as social ... Age is frequent visits to the doc and more tests and scans.. Age is more pills and supplements  to negotiate turbulent hornones.. But beyond everything, age is when the little bird  that had so far nestled within, who with her chirpy songs made your eyes sparkle  and made you dream... Who with her subtle flutters often made you blush and took your breath away.. Age is when she flies away taking  exuberance of youth along, leaving a few feathers behind, for you to reminisce  the glory of the past, to remind you that there are unfinished projects  and dreams to ...

New Zealand Spring

Spring in Newzealand  New Zealand Spring They say one would be sniffed by the sniffer dogs  for myriad prohibited stuff, on arrival at New Zealand.. Measures to protect and preserve  the pure and fragile ecosystem of the southern island nation.. But late into the the night  there were only cordial smiles of hearty welcome!! And out in the open  abundant fresh air  wraps you all around. .. The whole of earth is  carpeted green, albeit uneven.. Spread all over the lush greenery  sheep, cows and horses  feast and have their fill.. Wild flowers, mostly yellow, are thrown lavishly all over... Roses and peonies  as big as lotuses red, pink and white  sway in the wind... Coming out of the brooks, pebbles shine in the sun... Mountains stand tall,  still donning the snow cap... Loose feathers from those caps  scatter to form white clouds  floating in the sky... The blue sky, like a narcissist,  stand admiring...

Introspection

Introspection, mindfulness in psychological jargon, is important for mental health.. That is to look into oneself, being aware of one's own thoughts,  When you analyse your thoughts you may encounter a stranger. But, owning up is the key. Own up the stranger, the flawed  and crumbled being that you are. But do forgive.. Ability to forgive is one of the fundamental virtues one should possess. Sometimes it's hard to get a grip on oneself, with all the turbulence inside.. With myriad concoctions of emotions  that are produced in every passing moment, one is bound to spill some here and there, even being aware of the consequences.. That's why forgiving oneself is an essential skill to master the art of worthy living. Preetha Raj