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Mother Mary Comes To Me

Mother Mary Comes To Me
Arundhati Roy 
Penguin 

'Mother Mary Comes To Me' is a memorial grove Arundhati Roy built for her mother, Mary Roy. The epitaph on it says,
" In these pages, my mother, my gangster shall live. She was my shelter and my storm."

Mrs. Mary Roy was a warrior for the cause of women. She successfully challenged the Travancore Christian Succession Act which left daughters no right on their father's  property. She was a go-getter who built a reputed school out of a barren hill ( a 'mottakkunnu'). She was a bold woman who  never forgave ill-treatment, be it her own mother on the other side. But shouting at her children in front of others, making them  leave the car or the house according to her mood, punishing them for the slightest perceived incompetence, Mrs Roy was a difficult mother, if not an abusive one.

During her frequent bouts of asthma attacks, she used to tell her little girl that if she was dead, she would end up in the streets. Little Arundhati took it upon her to breathe valiantly for her mother albeit in imagination, being the organ child. 

Arundhati left home for Delhi to study architecture and stopped going home by the second year, the mother never enquired about her. But,during her years away from Mrs. Roy, she recognised that she owed her mother for the skills of survival. The education at a reputed Ooty school and the English language skills enabled her to navigate muddy waters of Delhi ghettos.  An English speaking vagrant was treated slightly better. "This is India, my dear." 

When she met Mr. Roy, her father,whom she left as a little girl of 3, she was surprised how the Roys stayed married for 5 years. The contrast was huge and even five minutes of togetherness was impossible to imagine. Micky Roy , who walked on his 'matchstick' legs was a jovial drunkard, a 'Nothing Man' as per Mrs. Roy.  Mrs Roy never tolerated incompetence. Mr. Roy recalled an event in which he asked his little daughter to get out of the car. Arundhati humourously observed  that perhaps the only common ground they shared was the way they treated their children.

Arundhati's narration is like a cloud drifting over the characters as the events unfolded, not melodramatic or emotional. Still, moving with her, the readers felt that 'cold moth' sitting on  their hearts quite often. She was a poor broken child who didn't let anyone hug her enough to heal her. Probably JC, her first man could have done that. But her instict was to flee from cozy attachments. She needed chaos to feel safe, to feel at home.

Probably her daughter's accomplishments made Mrs Roy proud. They were close during the later years in their own way. The daughter wanted to hug her mother during her last years, to reassure her. But, as Arundhati put it, "you can't  hug a porcupine."

Mother Mary Comes to Me is an intensely emotional autobiography, though the author springled humour to make it lighter. I love Arundhati Roy's beautiful prose and maybe she owes that to the Mother Mary.

Preetha Raj




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